Posted on by hildaweisburg

Tired of It All

Is it me or is February the fourteen month of 2020? We have been carrying so much for so long, but even with vaccines being distributed and administered, the pandemic marches on. When does it end? When can we put the burden down? The longer it goes on, the longer we have to push out the deadline for returning to “normal”, the harder it is.

We and everyone around us are continually exhausted. Lisa Kohn tells those in the business world How to Keep Leading When It Starts Getting “Old.” Some of her ideas are not new, but the reminder is helpful as we continue to lead despite the exhaustion.

Keep a Sense of Humor – Laughter is the best medicine is not just a maxim, it’s a fact. It changes the body chemistry for the better. Our need for laughter is possibly one reason for all the jokes and cartoons on Facebook and other social media. Sometimes it’s the black humor reminiscent of the Korean War set sitcom M*A*S*H, but it makes us laugh, and it eases some of the exhaustion. Laughter is also contagious. It brings out the best in other people. Then they can be more light-hearted and able to bring humor and new focus to the situation. 

Keep Things in Perspective – Tiredness leads to a mindset focused on negative absolutes. “This is never going to end.” “I will never have my library back again.” “Everybody is too stressed to work with me on a project.” Having these thoughts too often in the course of the day adds to a sense of hopelessness, contributing to exhaustion. The truth is not everything is in bad shape. Which leads to –

Look for What’s Good – Where has the pandemic given you new opportunities? What new contacts have you made? Find things that make you happy. What puts a smile on your face? It can be the smallest thing that helps you to balance out the barrage of negative news. I am sometimes stopped in my tracks while watching a bird find food in the snow. It may take more looking than usual, but the good is there.

Up the Self-Care – We are drained by continual stressful situations that trigger the fight/flight/flee mode. Self-care is an important means of combatting this. If you are having trouble giving yourself the time, you need to restore and rejuvenate (or at least step back a bit), put it on your to-do list. Remember, self-care is emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual. Have you tapped into all those areas to ensure you are taking care of yourself? Doing this for yourself will help you notice when those around you need more too.

Connect with Others – However You Can – We are social creatures, and the change and decrease in our interactions has been hard on everyone (even introverts!). Reach out to people professionally and personally. Like self-care, this can be part of your to-do list—something to look forward to. When I started making these calls, I thought I was doing it for them, but I have seen how much it brings to me. Have you noticed how many people are sending good morning messages via social media these days? It’s just one more way to get some of the human connection we need.

Acknowledge It’s Getting Old – No question about it. It’s a case of been there, done that, and have the T-shirt to prove it. Being honest about your feelings strengthens your bonds with others and allows them to be honest about where they may be struggling. Acknowledging the situation reinforces that we are all in this together, and together we will get through it.

Plan for the Future –Planning for the future, even knowing that it will not be the same as what was, is an important and positive act. It is also a part of self-care. Allow yourself see beyond the challenges of the present. It doesn’t matter what the future actually turns out to be. The act of thinking about it gives free rein to ideas that you might be able to incorporate into whatever happens. In the meantime, you will have given yourself the gift of dreaming.

One of the most challenging aspects of the pandemic has been how long it’s lasted coupled with not knowing how much longer it’s going to go on. Adapting and readapting is draining when you don’t know where the finish line is – or it keeps getting moved. Adding some of these ideas to your plans will hopefully help you, your program – and even your family – get through it all a little easier. And a little easier would be a lot welcome.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

The Ins and Outs of Negotiation

Don’t neglect this important leadership skill which can strengthen your program.

In the education world, where the library is only one small piece of the pie, knowing how and when to negotiate can grow your program and result in your being more valued. If you are like most school librarians, you rarely think consciously of how and when to negotiate. You are likely not to recognize when you have employed it, and as a result may not have achieved your aims. The business world, however, recognizes it a vital skill, and school librarians need to do the same.

One of my most successful negotiations came in the early stages of the tech explosion. I had just been responsible for building a new library wing in our high school, a huge expenditure. Now, I wanted to get the latest digital tool –  a CD-ROM tower. It cost $20,000. Obviously, if I put that in my budget for the next school year, it would be turned down. I knew what I wanted, why I wanted it, and what I could and couldn’t sacrifice to get it. I made an appointment with my Superintendent of Schools during the summer.

The Superintendent’s first response to my request was to refuse, as I expected. I briefly summarized the benefits and offered to make cuts elsewhere in my budget. When she suggested eliminating my periodical budget, I explained why that would be a problem, and proposed slashing my book budget. Ultimately, because of my determination, clarity and willingness to negotiate, I got the CD-ROM tower – and didn’t lose anywhere near $20,000 from my budget.

You have more opportunities to negotiate than you think. You can use negotiation to propose a collaborative or cooperative unit with teachers or you can negotiate with your principal to modify your non-library duties so they relate to your program. The idea is to be open to the possibility of changing what is to something better.

To increase this skill, Ed Browdow presents Ten Tips for Negotiating in 2021 that can help you achieve goals you didn’t think possible. Here are his ten with interpretations for school librarians:

  1. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want – If you don’t ask the answer is always, “No.” Leaders have a vision. Go for yours.
  2. Shut up and listen – Active listening is a must. Don’t rush into counter what is being said and be perceived as pushing your agenda. Pay attention so that you know what is at the root of the resistance.
  3. Do your homework – Know what the other person’s needs are. What is challenging them? How is what you want to do going to help with that? See where you can align with their priorities.
  4. Always be willing to walk away – Know when to stop. If you continue pushing when the other person is firm on their position, you are only going to increase resistance for the future. Not every negotiation ends positively.
  5. Don’t be in a hurry – While this means prolonged negotiations in the business world, for us it can mean not to give up or be upset if an appointment with an administrator is cancelled, a teacher needs to reschedule, or you are told they need time to think it over. Most negotiations are part of a longer process, not a quick yes or no decision.
  6. Aim high and expect the best outcome – Don’t second guess what is achievable. You want to lay out where you want to go. At the same time, this is a negotiation, so be prepared with your Plan B. And your Plan C.
  7. Focus on the other sides’ pressure not yours – This is where doing your homework counts. You want to present why what you are planning is beneficial to the other person whether it’s a principal or a teacher.
  8. Show the other person how their needs will be met – Related to the others sides’ pressure, if you can show where your request/suggestion/need supports them as well, you’re more likely to get the answer you want.  Be ready to be specific as much as possible. The best negotiations end with both sides feeling as though they’ve won.
  9. Don’t give anything away without getting something back – In our case this means being watching out for little landmines. For example, I had to be prepared for my Superintendent to seize on my offer to slash my book budget without giving me the tower. Had she suggested it, I would have pointed out that without the tower I was forced to make do with what I had on hand and so could ill afford my budget to be cut.
  10. Don’t take the other person’s behavior personally –This is about what you are trying to get but is influenced by the pressures and needs of the other person. Listen for the message rather than its delivery. Staying calm is a top tactic in negotiations.

Negotiations happen all the time, making this a great leadership skill to develop. Some are noticeable, others are easy to miss. They are present in your work and your home life. If you are aware of when the opportunity shows up and are prepared, you’ll strengthen your program and getting more of what you need.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Think, Create, Share, Grow

The four Domains in the title refer to the National School Library Standards for Learners, School Librarians, and School Libraries (NSLS) and should be familiar. As the Standards state, it’s the steps you use “to empower learners to master competencies ….” (p.15). It’s a continuum we have followed since the AASL Standards for the 21st– Century Learner (2009). While AASL has updated those standards, the continuum is still incorporated into our teaching. Is it incorporated into your professional life? When you focus on these Domains, you have a path to follow that can reduce stress or help move you and your program to a new level.

It starts with Think, the cognitive domain which deals with inquiry and critical thinking. Create is psychomotor and requires drawing conclusions, applying knowledge to new situations, and creating new knowledge. Share is the affective domain and involves sharing that new knowledge and participating ethically and productively in our democratic society. Grow moves into a developmental stage involving personal and aesthetic growth.

Consider how one Domain flows into the next. Although all are needed, you probably can identify more strongly with one of them. It’s always good to know where your strengths are and where you need to gain more proficiency. Now to apply them – in the library and in our lives.

Think – Take time to pause and look at the big picture, your Mission, your Vision. We don’t do that enough. What is working?  What isn’t?  What is and what isn’t in your control?  What is in your control that you would like to change?

It doesn’t have to be about the library. It can be in your personal life as well. We have a tendency to compartmentalize our work and private life, but one impacts the other. You might be concerned about not spending enough time with your family or be stressed by non-library duties. Select the one that is most important to you or the one over which you have the most control.

Create -What is your best method for representing a complex problem?  Many people like mind mapping. You could use a Google doc or a simple blank sheet of paper. Maybe dictating your thoughts into a document helps you. The purpose is to look at all the things buzzing in your ear and give yourself the ability to sort them out.

Color code, boldface, or do whatever works for you to highlight the best ideas you have. Move them around into an order that makes sense. If it’s something at home, can you make a schedule that helps you see where you can spend more time being with family rather than giving them the leftover minutes from your household tasks?  For a library issue, consider how to introduce “library” into those duties or offer a better proposition to the administration.

Share – Who needs to hear this? Who can help? If you don’t ask, people will rarely notice you have a problem. We are often so busy, we don’t take time to reach out, feeling that it will take too long, and either we might as well handle it ourselves or we don’t want to bother others.

For the personal issues, you may discover that others are feeling the same way. When you work together, it might solve the problem or at least reduce it. In the library, finding a good time to talk to the principal, keeping it brief and leading with solution can get you what you want. Particularly in this climate, your administrators are at least as stressed as you are. If you can help them, they are more likely than ever to go with your approach. It’s one more thing off their list.

If your plans work out, share them with other librarians and your friends. They may need the ideas and encouragement. We can all use help.

Grow – This is about you as a person and as a librarian. It might be self-care but also think of new avenues you wish to explore and give yourself a space for them. Whether it’s cooking or learning or getting back to playing an instrument, don’t dismiss the thought. To grow, we need to break open shell that encases us. What ideas excite and inspire you?

As a librarian, look how far have you stretched your leadership muscles. Just like starting an exercise plan, you don’t need to put in extensive new time. Consider doing a blog post for Knowledge Quest and share it (!) with your administrator when it is published. That one thing will raise awareness of what you contribute. And then you can get back to the ideas you came up with as part of Think.

Take time out to Think, Create, Share, and Grow. Notice ways these Domains can support you in and out of the library as well as those you serve. Look for ways to gain experience in the competencies that will improve your life, your leadership, and your librarianship. Let your imagination run wild and your program – and life – will move to a new level.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Communication – Positives and Pitfalls

Online, in person, via text or via social media, we are always communicating. It is the basic tool we use to form relationships, and relationships are the core of our success. As adults, one would think we would have mastered it by now, but it’s not that simple.

Because our interactions with others consist of multiple levels of communication, there are many opportunities for confusion. Most of the time we successfully send our message in a positive way and that is how it’s received. Other times we are not as successful, and we don’t always know why. What can we do to have conversations that produce the desired results?

What can we do to have conversations that produce the desired results?

Lolly Daskal has advice for business leaders, which applies to all. She minces no words in 9 Dumb Things Smart Leaders Need to Stop Doing Right Now. Here is her list:

  1. Stop talking over people – We strive for active listening, but when we’re excited or concerned we have a tendency to interrupt to get our comments and ideas in. When we don’t listen to others, they stop listening to us. (This is one I need to work on – especially when I’m harried.)
  2. Stop thinking you know best – There are knowledgeable, trustworthy people around you. Just because we know better than anyone how the library works doesn’t mean that others can’t offer something important. Their viewpoint can alert us to something that needs changing. Give them the respect of listening to what they say and the tenor of the conversation changes. You also gain a potential ally. Remember, it’s feedback, not criticism.
  3. Stop creating unattainable goals – Whether working with students or teachers, having a large goal is great, but if the receiver of the message feels it can’t be achieved, they will tune out, you will get annoyed, and your body will communicate that message. Instead, break goals down into smaller ones that do seem attainable. You don’t want your goals to add to anyone’s stress – including yours.
  4. Stop trying to control everything – When there is too much to do and not enough time, ironically, we tend not to trust anyone to help. We fall back on “you know best,” and it will take too much time to explain everything. Pause. Breathe. Then figure out how to loosen the reins otherwise you will probably come across as bossy and feel overwhelmed, unappreciated, and tired. When others can help, we inspire new leaders.
  5. Stop taking people for granted – Unless we consciously remember to acknowledge people, teachers, administrators and students. When we recognize their worth, they are more apt to recognize ours. Thank people for their time, support, encouragement, and help.
  6. Stop the hypocrisy – Keep your actions aligned with your words. When it comes to the big things, we rarely struggle, but the small things can slip our minds in a stress-filled day. Be aware of the possibility to keep it from happening.
  7. Stop imposing unnecessary rules – Some rules are necessary, but if they are arbitrary and/or make people’s lives more difficult, then they revision – or they need to go. Don’t set rules that make the library less welcoming. Look to create positively stated guidelines that support your Mission and Vision.
  8. Stop criticizing people in public – This applies not only to teacher (and administrators) but students as well. Public humiliation is harmful and can have long-term negative effects. Responding too quickly with a negative comment is damaging. Apologize immediately. No matter how well the person appeared to take the comment, the barb stung, and they won’t forget it.
  9. Stop trying to act alone – This is most likely to happen when we are guilty of #2 and #4. Daskal quotes the adage, “if you want to go fast, go alone, but if you want to go far, go together.”

We all have fallen into some of these communication pitfalls. Being mindful of them will minimize their occurrences. We need to ensure we send –and receive—messages positively. It builds our relationships and our leadership.