Posted on by hildaweisburg

Tips To De-stress

Are you stressed? That’s a really rhetorical question. Who isn’t these days? Even during summer break, and having the chance to take care of yourself, you’re likely thinking about what’s to come and what’s happening in the world around you.

The fact is stress is taking a toll on your body and your relationships all the time. And we can’t afford that. We have too many people who need us at our best – or close to it. Including ourselves.

In 10 Leaders, 10 Ideas for Lowering Stress, Amber Johnson synthesizes the ideas of ten businesses leaders, all feeling high stress. She divides the ideas into three categories:Work Strategies, Physical Strategies, and Mindset Strategies. I will add my library world adaptations to the business world view and hope that we all find way to lower our stress:

Work Strategies

Fix the root of the problem – Is there a way to fix the deeper causes of your problems. It’s not easy, and it may not be obvious, but it’s worth considering. You can’t change the political climate, for example, but you can find support and advocates for your work and collection. Make a list of a few things you can do. Get creative. Have you tapped into the resources offered by your state library association and the national library associations?

Let go of the little things – There are some things that are urgent and need energy and attention. But what doesn’t? Johnson asks what can you pause? Do you have to work through lunch? Would a walk or time chatting with school friends energize you more for the rest of the day? Think of ways to turn your brain off for a while and relax. And look for these places outside of work too. Can you get someone to clean your house? Mow the lawn?

Find your plug-and-play patterns – How have you handled stress in the past that worked? For me it’s winning an X number of computer solitaire games. Chances are things that worked previously will help you again.

Physical Strategies

Take care of your body – You know stress takes a toll on your body. It’s at the root of numerous medical conditions. Look for ways to actively start taking care of yourself. Get to bed earlier. Cut down on the frequency of junk food and choose healthier foods. Exercise or at least stretch a given number of minutes each day. If that’s too hard at first, do it for two or three days in the week. Start small and build.

Work with your senses – Johnson recommends the “54321 technique”: name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. What it really does is getting you to breathe and centers you in the moment rather than worrying about the past or being concerned about the future. When stressed our breaths become shallow, and we don’t get enough oxygen to our brain making the challenge worse.

Find ways to play – Those with young children or pets can do this easily. I love doing Wordle every day and posting my score on Facebook. My friends comment with how they did. Are you reading for pleasure? Is there  a hobby or craft you’ve dropped or want to pick up? Joy and fun can help alleviate stress.

Take a getaway – Weekend vacations are great for some. I love having a dinner or even a lunch with friends. A change of scene can make a big difference.

Mindset Strategies

Take care of your mind – Our minds are so powerful and the stories we tell ourselves have a huge impact on our wellbeing. As I have said in the past, I keep a Gratitude Journal where I record daily three things for which I am grateful and one way I give back. I also have a container with a small note pad in it. Whenever something wonderful happens to me or my family, I write it along with the date on a paper from the notebook, fold the paper, write the date again on the folded sheet and put it in the canister. On New Year’s Day, I take out the sheets, arrange them in chronological order, and read them to discover what a great year I had.

Draw boundaries – Johnson mentions ending your day by a certain time. I do that and also don’t take messages from my landline util the end of the day. To do this, you’ll need to know the boundaries, set the boundaries, and then keep them. This may have a bit of a learning curve, so give yourself some grace during the process.

Find the mantra that works for you – Whether it’s an affirmation or a simply a sentence that grounds you, as librarians, we know the power of words. Find one that works for you and pull it out when you need it. I remind myself of a story with the closing line, “This will change.” I also am using the words on a bracelet I was given as a birthday gift, “You Can.”

Stress is not going to magically disappear, so it’s imperative to find the coping strategies that work for you. Notice the ones you’ve been using – and if they’ve been working. If you need new ones, then add to your collection. For me, it always helps when I can find ways to laugh and find the joy in my life. You deserve that, too!

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Calming the Butterflies

Public speaking. It can make even the most polished professional panicky.. Getting up to speak before an audience can be a terrifying moment. It is said that people fear it more than death. It’s even a challenge for even well-known performers. Adele, Rhianna and Barbra Streisand all reportedly suffer from stage fright.

But you need to face these fears. You are a leader, and at some point, you are going to have to speak before a group or do something else that makes you nervous. When this happens, don’t avoid the possibility and lose the opportunity to show your value to an administrator. It is not what leaders do.

Instead, prepare for it by knowing what to do when the butterflies start churning. In her article, Why the First 30 Seconds of a Stressful Situation Are the Most Critical, Stephanie Vozza provides four steps to get you through those moments. Vozza explains those first seconds are the peak anxiety time. Since this is when all your bodily functions go into freeze and flight, they are the key to getting past the worse of this. Here are her four steps:

  • Practice Meditation – It doesn’t need to be more than two minutes, but if do it each day (or at least regularly), you become accustomed to stilling your heartbeat. When you are faced with getting up to the podium, or anything that has your pulse racing, you can do your accustomed routine. Your body will easily recognize what it needs to do.
  • Just Breathe – Not the usual in and out, but in a more fully mindful way. Become aware of your breathing and your body. Notice the physical manifestations of your tension. Are you clenching your teeth? Are your fingers tightened into fists? By being mindful you can do what it takes to physically relax. Breathe. Notice. Untense those tight muscles.
  • Harness Your Inner Superhero – Just as your body adds to your tension by its responses, it can do the opposite and telegraph confidence. Straighten your stance. Throw your shoulders back. You have this. You know your stuff. You are well prepared. Think of your favorite empowering song and go for it.
  • Rehearse Challenges – One of the best ways to be calm in the moment is to prepare in advance. If you’re giving a presentation, know the opening paragraph. Print it out on something you can read easily without it being too conspicuous. Once you get past that opening, you will be fine. Can you get into the room early? Seeing where you will be can help you to envision yourself succeeding.

How you manage the challenges and stresses you will face as a leader is up to you. As with so many things in life, you can go one of two ways. You can let the stress engulf you and avoid ever doing it again. Or you can embrace the challenge. Prepare yourself in advance and prove to yourself you can handle this.

Being a leader involves getting out of your comfort zone and taking on new challenges. Whether it’s public speaking or running for an office in your state/national organization, there will be scary moments as you start and even once you have attained a new level of being in the public eye. The more often you take the chance, the more often you will succeed. And each success will build an extra layer of confidence.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

The Sound – and Benefit – of Silence

We live in a noisy world. Throughout our waking hours, noise, information, background sounds and beeps, dings, and other signals of incoming messages on our phones, tablets, and computers assault our brains. We’ve become so accustomed to it that we don’t realize the toll it’s taking on our mind and body. Schools are out, or nearly so, across the country. We need to take a break from all the noise and luxuriate in silence, at least for a little while. Silence allows us to recuperate, reflect, and rejuvenate.

Justin Zorn and Leigh Marz offer insight into the issue in this article, and their new book, Golden: The Power of Silence in a World of Noise. Using five key insights, they move us through recognizing the scope of the problem to finding a solution that fits us as individuals.

  1. Silence isn’t just the absence of noise–The statement made me pause—and in essence that is what true silence is. It’s the full stop that has us being solely in the moment. Zorn and Marz say it is, “the experience of pristine attention, the space where no person or thing is making claims on our consciousness.” Can you recall a moment of such silence? Frequently, the moment was provided by the natural world. It could also come from reading a perfect sentence that stops you from going on. Sometimes, it’s a deeply spiritual moment. Whatever it is, the world comes to a halt, giving us a gift that’s important to recognize and cherish.
  2. The world is noisier than ever—in our ears, on our screens, and in our heads. Just as many of us lose a lot of time to being stuck in traffic, so to do we lose time figuring out what we were up to before phone call or other noise interrupted us. According to the book “Researchers have found that most people switch between different online content every 19 seconds, and the average person spends one full hour per day working to get back on track after interruptions from phones or social media.” In addition, the mental conversations we have–frequently negative self-talk–are another distraction. All of this noise makes it harder for us to stay focus and take time for what we most want to be doing.
  3. Noise is our society’s most celebrated addiction. We measure and celebrate progress based on what is being produced. Silence adds nothing to that measurement. We have forgotten we are human beings. We are all about being human doings. These moments of pristine attention are not valued. If not valued, we move to the assumption that we shouldn’t waste time with it. And in so doing, we have missed the true value attention and silence bring to our well-being.
  4. To get beyond noise, look beyond the typical rules and tools of mindfulness. We have all been advised and even trained in bringing mindfulness into our lives. While mindfulness has brought improvements into our lives, most of us find we are not managing it well enough. Instead, even knowing that mindfulness helps, we’re more distracted than ever. While there is no one size fits all solution, Zorn and Marz offer this recommendation –“notice noise, then tune in to silence.” Be aware of those great moments of pristine attention. What grabs you is different from what does it for others. Enjoy what moves you.
  5. The simple act of listening to silence can regenerate our brains. The duo quote Pythagoras, “Let your quiet mind listen and absorb the silence.” According to Duke Medical University researchers, listening to the silence promotes neuron development. How wonderful to discover that silence is productive.

Get out in nature, Contemplate art. Sit with your coffee and your thoughts. Learn where your moments of silence occur and seek them out. Silence is truly golden.