Posted on by hildaweisburg

Maximize Your Time

There are only 24 hours in a day, and no matter what you do – or how much needs to get done – there’s no way to use them all for work. So the goal becomes using the hours we have to our best advantage. But here’s the thing – what works for one person and seems productive, might not work for you and could, in fact, be detrimental to you in the long run. So before you decide how to organize your time – take the time to learn how you work best.

To create your own personal plan for maximizing your time, consider following this 4-step approach Chris Taylor presents in his article How to Make Your Days More Productive:

  1. What To Do –  Start by knowing your priorities – for a project, a semester, a school year. Even knowing this, you won’t get everything done (have you ever?) but if you can get clear on what’s most important and what will get you closest to where you want to be then you can organize your time and to-do lit accordingly.
  2. When To Do It – This is where it gets even more personal. What is your most productive time of the day? When are you most creative?  For me, it’s first thing in the morning.  I know other people who like to work at night when everyone else is sleeping. Schedule your high priority tasks at the times when you are most clear. Of course, if you’re not a morning person but are at work then, as best you can, do the activities that align with your energy and ability to focus.
  3. Where To Do It – Environment can play a large role in our productivity. Is your office space the best place for you to work?  Do you like or not like the buzz of others working nearby?  Do you find being outdoors stimulates your thinking? Be as honest as you can and then see where you can adapt your workflow to fit. Can you clear off your desk? What about adding pictures of favorite places that you can see while you work? When can you close your door?
  4. How To Do It Well – That is the ultimate challenge.  You need to turn off the interruptions that take you away from being as productive as possible.  This is not necessarily other people interrupting you.  It can be seeing stuff popping up in your email.  Or the phone ringing. Turn them off. Don’t see your email when you are working on these high priority tasks.  Turn off your phone until you are ready to attend to those messages. And when it’s time to focus on emails – stay focused on them and get as many answered as you can in the time you give it.

Like anything else, it will take practice and iteration of these four steps to make them part of your routine, but the results are worth it. Be prepared to tweak it as you work with it and learn what supports your success. Maybe you thought you could be creative for two hours at a time, but one is better followed by a break. Do what you can to limit the break, then get back to the priorities. There’s no way to add more time to the clock – so add time to your day by using what you have in the way the best supports you.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Getting Positive Results From Difficult Conversations

Whether it’s with an administrator or a colleague, there are times when you are in opposite corners about how to do something. Ignoring the issue won’t make it go away—and will likely make things worse. When it’s an administrator, you might be seen as being insubordinate, which can cause severe consequences. In the situation with a teacher, your avoidance will hinder future collaboration and having a positive working relationship.

The conversation must happen. The results depend on how you approach and plan it. Go in knowing you won’t get everything you want, but that’s not the objective. Your goal is to make it work, not win an argument. Going in with the intention of winning is a guarantee that you won’t get a result that works.

In her article, Use the “Magic Wand of Destiny” to Get the Desired Outcomes, Kathy Stoddard Torrey puts forth a five-step approach that I believe can be very effective in helping you achieve the best possible results from these difficult conversations.

  • Define the Outcome – What is it you want to achieve and what are different parts of that goal (because remember, you’re not getting everything). Know what you need most. What will make the situation feel best for you? You’ve been told to close the library for several periods to allow for a meeting of the leagues Athletic Directors (ADs), but this restricts usage for others. A teacher wants students to use only books from the library for a project.
  • Create the Proper Space- Since you are initiating the conversion after learning about the challenge, you set the tone for it. An adversarial opening will not get the result you want. In dealing with the principal, you want to open with, “I will definitely give the ADs the space and time they need.” With the teacher, you can start with, “I want to fully understand your planned project.”
  • Ask Curious Questions – Show interest and willingness to help. These are people you want and need to work with. Ask the principal to let you know how many ADs will be coming. How often do they meet? Do they vary their meeting location? Ask the teacher, how many class periods will students be researching in the library? How does this project fit into the larger unit? What resources will they need and for how long?
  • Listen to Their Solutions First – Knowing what the other person expects can help you form your responses. In my examples, you and the library are the solution, so restate them to let them know you recognize what they want. For other situations, when the whole thing wasn’t spelled out in advance, let them explain how they expect to go about it. Continue to ask questions to be sure you have really understood what they want. Sometimes, in those answers, you can find a new solution. Once they have finished, propose your modifications. Ask the principal if you really need to close the whole library. Perhaps you can have a privacy screen around where the ADs meet, and classes can continue as scheduled. Show the teacher one particularly pertinent database and suggest it be offered as well, so students get used to taking notes from print and digital resources.
  • Ask Yourself: Does It Matter? – Choose your difficult conversations wisely. You don’t have to reach your desired outcome all the time. If accepting the recommendation or request doesn’t compromise your ethics, you might strengthen the relationship best by not asking for changes to their original request. When you go along with their plan, it can be a step in building the relationship.

The better you get at managing tough conversations, the stronger you become as a leader – and the more confidence you will gain. In the current education and political climate – in the US and abroad – there are more difficult conversations happening. We all need to work on not letting them become adversarial.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Build Your Leadership On Your Strengths

So much of how we feel about going to work each day depends on our leaders. A great principal can make your day. A lousy one can kill your year. Many of us have had both and there are lessons to be learned from either. Let me give you two of mine.

My best principal ever knew all the teachers well. He was adept at noticing whether you were not yourself. If he saw that you were having an off day, he would often tell you to go to the nurse’s office and relax. He would teach your class. His leadership had so many benefits. The teachers felt that he not only cared, but he would take care of them. And the teachers were always willing to give back. If there was a shortage of a substitute one day, and he asked a teacher to cover an additional class, they would do so gladly. He also got to know the students on a different level from most principals I worked with, further showing his commitment and consistency.

On the other hand, I had a principal who was an egotistical misogynist. I, and almost everyone else, gave him the bare minimum. I was exhausted at the end of every day and brought my tension and anger home a lot. Too many of my dinner conversations began with, “You know what he did today?” It took me about a year before I appreciated how he was affecting all aspects of my life. Eventually, I began job hunting and found another position.

They both showed me important things about leadership – and how I did and didn’t want to lead. The first principal exuded empathy, an often-cited leadership quality. The second fell into the category of a leader who exemplified Power Over as his approach to leadership. What I hadn’t considered until I read Suzanne Degges-White’s article Are Ambiverts the Most Effective Leaders was a different way to determine your leadership mode.

Degges-White looks at introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts. We are familiar with the first two, but ambiverts, who embody both types, are less well known. And she says regardless of whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, you can become an ambivert. It is also important to recognize that no matter your type, you can be a good leader. “Effective leadership is based on healthy and productive relationships, not just personality types.” My two examples are evidence of that.

Taking a closer look at the strengths of each type of leader, Degges-White observes that introverts are good listeners, which means they think before jumping in to say something. They build relationships slowly and with care. They don’t seek the limelight, instead recognize the strengths others have. Extroverts are comfortable in a variety of settings. They tend to make decisions more quickly and pivot rapidly when needed. They are the ones who are seen as “natural” leaders.

So, what about ambiverts and their strengths? While they might like their alone time, they also enjoy being with others. They are comfortable with both individual projects and working on group ones. As leaders, they aren’t impulsive, but are open to trying new approaches. They are not afraid of taking risks, another often mentioned leadership quality.

The good news is that no matter if you see yourself as more of an introvert or an extrovert, you can become more of an ambivert. It only takes a few small steps to make you an ambivert. Fearful of risks? Take a few small ones. Do you dominate conversations? Make it a point to let others speak before you do. As you practice these steps, you will take on more and more qualities of ambivert.

As a leader, you always want to work from your strengths, but you can also get better. By stretching your natural personality type, you can become an ambivert – the most effective type of leader.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Avoiding Conflict – Makes It Worse

As School Librarians one part of our job is to have positive relations with all our colleagues, but this doesn’t mean you’re going to like everyone. There will always be people who rub you the wrong way or who you wish you could avoid. People with whom it’s hard to speak, who have opposing viewpoints and with whom there is always a sense of conflict. But avoiding them and the situation prevents any likelihood of having positive relations.

So how can we powerfully step into situations where we know there is going to be conflict? In her post, Uncovering 5 Hidden Stages of Conflict, Marlen Chisolm explores how to look at what is going on under the service because, she asserts, the conflict is not the problem. The avoidance is. To understand this better, Chisholm discusses all the ways avoidance comes into play:

  1. Inner Disturbance – You just feel “off” every time you are in contact with that person. You get the feeling they don’t like you. It may not be overt, but you can’t avoid that antipathy coming from them. It’s uncomfortable, so you avoid unnecessary conversations with them or being in proximity to them. 
  2. Justifying – It doesn’t seem reasonable to confront them about that sensation. What could you say, anyway? Do you suspect it’s some innate bias, and then wonder if you are being ultrasensitive. Yet letting it go on doesn’t change anything. People treat you as you train them to treat you. What you accept will continue. By excusing or letting it go, you avoid facing and discussing the situation.
  3. Seeing Them as Adversary – When you let the situation continue, you tense every time you interact with them. Chisolm says we frequently find ourselves viewing  them as the enemy. While that is a natural self-defense, it doesn’t deal with the problem or cause any changes. Again, you are avoiding and the conflict continues.
  4. Seeking Social Proof – The longer it goes on, the more you look for evidence as to whether you are the only target, or to see if the person is that way with others. Now you seek corroboration. You ask others if they are seeing/feeling the same thing you are. In addition to not solving the problem, you are creating divisions which can affect how your community functions.Word will get back to the person, or worse to administrators, as to your queries. Nothing about will make you look professional. Through your avoidance, the problem has gotten worse.
  5. Aggression – As you continue avoiding the issue, you become increasingly frustrated and angry. Now you run the risk of a real blow up. Whatever follows will be heated. You have become the initiator and have probably damaged your reputation. Hopefully, your explosion didn’t happen where others could see, although word will spread. Being able to work with this teacher will be incredibly difficult, if not impossible. By avoidance, you have now also harmed students who won’t get the learning experiences you normally create.

Avoidance may seem safe, but as Chisolm has shown, it’s the worst option possible. As soon as you get that “Inner Disturbance,” accept that it’s a wake-up call to act. Take time –not too long—to gather your thoughts. What is the outcome you want? Ask yourself, “Do you want it to work, or do you want to win? Because if you want to win, it won’t work.”

Be prepared to do active listening. Don’t try to rush in with counter-arguments. Arguments are power struggles. The Power you need to draw on is Power With which is finding common ground among different interests. What do you and that teacher have in common? Focus on that.

Don’t let micro aggressions or other perceived negative feelings coming from someone affect your ability to be a good leader. Leaders work well with others and are willing to take risks when needed. 

Posted on by hildaweisburg

How To Tap Down Triggers

EDITOR’S NOTE – This blog about a specific and contained type of triggers. More serious, lasting triggers need a different kind of attention and help. Please get the support you need and deserve.

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What is a trigger? A month ago, I wrote Look for Glimmers and Find Joy which discussed how Glimmers were the opposite of triggers. Both cause an unanticipated emotional reaction. The first is wonderfully positive. The second can cause us any number of negative effects including damaging our relationships and how people perceive us and our program.

Glimmers and triggers are opposite in one other way. You have to notice glimmers to appreciate them. Triggers slam into you without any invitation.

While triggers take you unaware, if you are going to deal with them, you need to recognize when you are having a trigger response. This isn’t easy when your emotions are taking over.

Andrea Mein DeWitt’s article, A Leader’s 3-Step Strategy to Being Less Emotional, Reactive, recommend you Name, Claim, and Reframe. This approach will give you skills to modify what could be a damaging response from you. Notice that she references “leaders.” Leaders can’t allow triggers to affect how they react in a given situation.

Here are her steps:

  1. Name – Look for the source of the trigger. (This is not like noticing glimmers, but in reverse.) She asks you to identify what is causing you to react rather than respond – an important distinction – and what specific emotion is in play. Also note what, if any, of your core values have been attacked. For example, book banning and malicious name-calling is on the rise leaving us emotionally exhausted. We are tired of explaining. When one more attack comes, particularly if it comes from what we thought was a friendly source, we can explode.
  2. Claim – Now that you know where your reaction came from, what can you do about it? De Witt wants you to identify the action(s) you can take to bring you back to your core values. Take your ego out and think what might have caused the person to say/do what then triggered your reaction. Then, look to what can you do to get the conversation back to the issue at stake. Rather than responding by saying “we are not…(insert charge)..” turn to the positive, reminding parents, teachers and administrators that,“libraries need to be a safe, welcoming space for all.” From there, you can better discuss what to do.
  3. Reframe – This helps you to move on positively from a stressful conversation. DeWitt says to ask yourself what you learned and what is now an opportunity to use your creativity. Which of the ideas you came up with will produce the best results and promote your Mission and Vision? Notice any new resources you can now use. As you reflect on what happened, you might decide to do a bulletin board or infographic identifying how libraries create a safe space. Perhaps mention the Mirrors, Windows, and Sliding Doors concept. Do something interactive such as having teachers/students anonymously post notes on the bulletin board saying how the library/librarian made them safe and welcome.

We are in the relationship business. With emotions running high and politics affecting libraries and librarians, we must do all we can to avoid being further sucked into the intensity of the triggers and stresses around us. Emotional Intelligence includes Managing Your Emotions for a reason. Leaders – and you are a leader – need to have all the tools possible to do it.