Posted on by hildaweisburg

Humility as a Superpower

Humility: A modest or low view of one’s importance. Humbleness. Freedom from pride or arrogance.

What was your first thought when seeing the title for this blog? Was it confusion? Understandable because it sounds counterintuitive. I write and present often about leadership and discuss power. So where does humility fit in? In a world where rampant ego is projected as a superpower and proof of leadership, humility seems to lurk in the shadows, frequently associated with religious values.

And yet… there is more to humility in good leaders and leadership than you think. In Humility as a Psychological Task for Leaders, Dr. Paul J Dunion describes humility as a hidden treasure and identifies the five tasks necessary and then lists the benefits. These are the tasks he gives along with my suggestions for how we might incorporate them into our leadership:

  1. Gaining comfort with one’s limits – None of us are perfect. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Know both. When you accept that you have weaknesses, you can ask for help in those areas. I am a big picture person and tend to overlook what seems like obvious details. I usually check with someone who can help me see what I missed.
  2. An increased acceptance of their imperfection – It’s embarrassing when we notice we’ve made a mistake or overlooked something. But this is both normal and acceptable. Dunion says those who have “exaggerated expectations of achievements (get) caught in striving for perfection.” And since that’s unachievable, it becomes exhausting and detrimental to success.
  3. Radical accountability – Admitting mistakes is hard. It can make you feel you aren’t good enough. One form of accountability is accepting and owning the mistakes you make. A second, which Dunion recommends, is to practice gratitude instead for all the help you have received and for the help you will need in the future.
  4. A heartfelt commitment to be rightsized – Too often, we try to project we don’t have weakness because we want to appear confident in dealing with the increasing demands of our jobs. Don’t inflate yourself, your abilities or your accomplishments to keep up with expectations. Neither should you downplay and make what you have done smaller as a way to not be noticed. Either will get you in trouble down the line. Being rightsized is “a measure of (your) competencies, (your) shortcomings, and the true nature of (your) achievements.”
  5. A capacity to appreciate and acknowledge the strengths and accomplishments of others– It doesn’t make you “less” when you acknowledge what someone else has accomplished. If you acknowledge a teacher, you are likely to build or strengthen your relationship and role as a leader. When it’s a librarian who has done something special, that person can possibly help you achieve the same.

And here are his Benefits:

  • Leaders can access a capacity to offer inclusivity, empathy, and inspiration – Which is how we want to be with our students and teachers.
  • Leaders begin to experience a refined sense of security as their limits and mistakes are welcome – Having acknowledged you aren’t always right, makes mistakes unthreatening.
  • Leaders experience a deepened sense of being trustworthy – No matter how you try to hide mistakes, they are recognized by others (and yourself). Being honest about mistakes build trust.
  • Humility allows leaders to be less competitive with colleagues and more able to acknowledge and appreciate their strengths – Honestly knowing your strengths – and weaknesses helps you see more realistically.
  • As humble leaders are honest and define themselves as okay with their shortcomings, their cultures take on more psychological safety – It makes it easier for your colleagues and students to acknowledge their mistakes making everyone feel safer.

You have a big job and many people need you. Don’t try to be perfect. Accept your limits along with your achievements. Work on giving your best and continuing to be the lifelong learners you are as a librarian.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Being Human

What does it mean to be a human? The biological definition doesn’t come close to the contextual meaning and the layers the word means to us. Over the years I have discussed many qualities of leadership, but human wasn’t one of them. A post by Kerry Azar, Great Leadership is Radically Human, has me thinking that I had missed an important quality. It encompasses much of what constitutes Emotional Intelligence, but goes beyond that to a new level.

Our first thoughts of what a leader is tends to focus on their dynamism and vision. Someone who gets things done. This is true, but it’s only about the “doing.”  We are human “beings.” How we act and behave is more important. In our dealings with others, we need to be human. Being that way is how great leaders behave.

In her post, Ms. Azar writes of being “radically human.” She defines it as, “showing up (in) more transparent, authentic, vulnerable, empathetic, passionate, and compassionate ways.” When you are human, you behave as such wherever you go. Others respond on a deep emotional level to that kind of leadership. Think of the administrators you have had who you admired and loved working for. They were undoubtedly human beings. They cared. They pitched in when needed. They were supportive. You felt safe in going to them with a problem, knowing they would help.

We all know humans make mistakes. Being transparent and vulnerable about these mistakes makes you real. You don’t hide your doubts. You welcome input from others. We are never perfect. Accepting that in yourself and others creates that safe, welcoming environment we strive for in our libraries.

Being passionate shows our values and core beliefs. Anyone who meets me knows I am passionate about school librarians being leaders and intellectual freedom. Letting your passion show lets people know what matters to you as a person. It also gives them the freedom to share who they are. This is how relationships are built. And we are in the relationship business, so being human is good for our work.

Azar also talks about “kintsugi,” a Japanese art form which repairs broken items by putting them back together using precious metals. The restored item doesn’t look like the original but it “maintains the integrity of the original creation while creating something even more beautiful and enduring. Kintsugi is a suitable metaphor for how a great leader deals with our pandemic-challenged world. When we view it as creating something new amidst the broken and perhaps something better, we help ourselves find the direction forward. This allows us to lead the way, helping others do so as well.

Being radically human isn’t easy. Azar suggests we take time to ask, “how am I getting in my way”, not to look for where we’re making mistakes, but rather to look for how to be more transparent, authentic, vulnerable, empathic, passion and compassionate. When we do that, we will find our way forward and be able to grow through what life brings us.