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Failure Is Part of the Path

When we plan a project, set a goal, aim for a target, we think of all the things we need to do and what will think and hope will happen along the way. Something we generally don’t factor in is the times when we will fail.. Although we often tell students that Fail stands for “First Attempt In Learning,” we rarely accept it as true for ourselves. Failure is scary. It makes us look bad. We do everything we can to avoid it. But is also necessary. Without it we don’t learn, and we don’t get better.

Nothing great is ever achieved in one step. The steps along the way will always include some failures. And if you let the fear failure get in the way, you will either back away from what you are doing when it happens or not start at all. As a leader, you need to take risks, and risks bear the possibility of failure. But without risk there is no reward – and no success.

In her article, How That Wretched Slog Makes Way for Your True Potential, Laura Gassner Otting says, “Each time we accomplish something — big or small — we see a version of ourselves that we didn’t yet know existed.” Ironically coupled with this, each success often brings new worry about being good enough, capable enough to do it. Even in our success we are fearing future failure. If this is the case, we need to accept and get through this fear. Gassner offers this way to get past the fear of failure:

  • Let’s Not Fake It Till We Make It – Playing it safe will not bring big changes. Doing only what has been done before, the way it has been done before, won’t get you anywhere. Think of what it must have been like to be the first or one of the first to generify the collection. Give up Dewey? Unheard of. Who would ever think we would suggest dropping fines or even charging for lost books. Out of the box thinking isn’t safe, but it moves us into the future. Embrace the fear that may be part of taking the risk as part of the process – and a sign that you’re moving forward.
  • Re-Categorize Failure from Finale to Fulcrum – Gassner suggests we adopt a beginner’s mindset. We need to see failure as the point from which we learn something that will help us accomplish the next step. Failures should raise new questions and give us the opportunity to see something we didn’t anticipate and pivot. Think, why didn’t this work? What was missing? What, if anything, needs to be changed? How can I do it differently? And never forgot to consider, who can I ask for help?
  • Take a Lesson from the Pros – Professional athletes spend a great deal of time perfecting what they are already doing right. But they also face the fact that they aren’t perfect. They watch videos of their performance and see where they are not doing it well. Then they work on that. It’s harder and uncomfortable, but they do it. Go back to the basics first so you have those to build on, make changes and see if they work. If they don’t take a step back and adjust. Remember – athletes don’t expect perfect, but they are always looking for how they can improve.

Fear is part of the process – but it doesn’t get to stop the process. What fears are keeping you in a safe place? Don’t let fear of failure keep you from stepping out of your comfort zone – and making it bigger. Accept the possibility of failing and embrace that it isn’t saying anything negative about your or your plan. Take a chance. Although you will fail some time, as you pile up your successes your reputation as a leader will grow – and so will you.

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Your Body Is Talking – Do You Know What It’s Saying?

We are communicating constantly. Because our communications go beyond what we say, write, and text, in my book, The Art of Communication: A Librarians Guide for Successful Leadership, Collaboration, and Advocacy (Libraries Unlimited, 2022), I devote a whole chapter to the “Silent Messages You Send.” We can never forget that our bodies speak for us as well.

Our posture, the position of our arms and legs, and the full range of our facial expressions are all conveying a message. Most of the time, the non-verbal message is, hopefully, aligned with what we are saying. Sometimes it isn’t. When we are uncertain, we are prone to sending mixed messages which can push our audience away and inhibit trust.

Those mixed messages are more likely to occur when we are giving a presentation. Whether we are teaching our colleagues about a new tech app or speaking at a state or national conference, we are nervous. We might have some stage fright. The Imposter Syndrome kicks in. And now you are facing your audience. If your body is apt to be telling your audience how uncertain you are, you won’t be able to get your message across as clearly as you want. This is where practicing in front of a mirror or even taking a video can help. Be honest about what you see and soon you’ll be more comfortable.

One of the things that can benefit your ability to connect with whomever you’re speaking to (whether an individual or a group) is supporting gestures that correspond with what you are saying. Is learning this worth the effort? It is according to Frankie Kemp. In his blog article (you’ll need to sign up for SmartBriefs to read it), he describes these seven Unexpected Ways That Gestures Can Up Your Leadership Communication:

  1. Become more trusted – Based on studies, including an analysis of TED speakers, those who used gestures were trusted more, People saw those who didn’t use them as cold and logical. You would think being logical would be good, but audiences want and need to connect to speakers. Additionally, I think they are also reacting to that mixed message. Your body is indicating uncertainty and stiffness. The message becomes: Why should they listen to you?
  2. Dispel nervous energy – Hand gestures that correspond to your message give you something to do to keep them from shaking. Meanwhile your messages are in sync.
  3. Be more succinct – You won’t need as many words when your verbal and nonverbal messages are in accord. This gives you more time to interact with your audience, improving the quality of your presentation.
  4. Increase problem-solving capacity – Suppose someone in your audience asks a difficult question. One of the easiest ways to draw on your expertise when you answer – is to move. According to Kemp, studies show we problem-solve better when we move. While you are doing so, you are also taking in more of your audience and maybe standing more directly in front of the person who asked a question, making them feel seen.
  5. Increase your self-confidence – In another study, it’s been shown that positive posture (head up, shoulders back, spine straight) not only affects the viewer but has an important impact on the speaker. Testosterone goes up and cortisol (stress hormone) goes down; your self-confidence automatically lifts. If this feels new or uncomfortable for you, practice your posture-pose before presenting. You might want to do so before a meeting with your principal, too.
  6. Achieve more credibility and presence – Kemp points to research showing those who use hand gestures and had more frequent eye contact with the audience (as opposed to darting around) and were more trusted. From what I have experienced, it is also because the gestures send the same message as the words.
  7. Be seen as fair – When making eye contact, don’t focus on the same few members of the audience. That can send a message of excluding people. According to Kemp, it can even be seen as a micro-aggression. Allow your eyes to sweep the attendees, resting on different people each time.

As a leader, there will be many occasions when you must speak professionally and when it’s important that your message be received. Whether before an important individual or a group of teachers, parents, or fellow librarians, you need to become comfortable in these situations. Be mindful that you are always communicating and work to send the consistent, clear messages you want.

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Face Your Fears & Reach Your Vision

Over the years, I have read and supported the writing of countless Mission and Vision Statements. Most people write good to great Missions even on the first try. The Vision Statements, however, have been far less successful. They often are variations of the Mission. What’s the problem?

Missions are your Perspiration, your Why. It’s what you do each day. Visions are your Inspiration and Aspiration. What would you like the library to be? How do you want it to be perceived by others? These are frequently harder to write because we aren’t convinced can ever be true. The other thing that stops us – fear.

We worry that if we write a big Vision, we are committing ourselves to achieving it. But here’s the thing – a Vision is not a goal. It’s a potential destination. What we need to do is create a big Vision and then through our fears of the goals that will help us get there.

In his article, Conquering the Fear of Goal-setting, Naphtali Hoff explains why setting such big goals is hard, why it is necessary to do it, and some simple ways to get started.

What Makes It Hard to Do

  • Fear of Failure – It’s risky putting a big goal out there. I recommend hanging your Vision along with your Mission in a prominent place in your library. Everyone will know what you’re striving for and what you want them to be a part of. And you will see it. Every day.
  • Fear of Commitment – Now that you said it, you must do it. It’s a huge task. And you have just signed on to work on making it a reality. Follow through can be very scary.
  • Uncertainty and Overwhelm – Now that you have written it, is this really what you want that reality to look like? Maybe you should rethink it for a while. (HINT: No). After all, your workload is heavy enough just dealing with your Mission and its daily responsibilities. How are you going to fit this in?
  • Self-doubt – You may find yourself thinking this Vison involves so many component, I don’t know nearly enough. Remember – you’re a lifelong learner. What you don’t know… you don’t know yet.
  • Fear of Change – What we know is more comfortable than the new. You know what to expect and how to deal with it. What if the changes don’t work? But remember – if nothing changes, nothing changes.

Why It’s Important to Set Goals

  • Provides Direction – As Yoga Berra allegedly said, “If you don’t know where you are going, you will wind up someplace else.” Once you know your Vision, it gives you a focus for your your strategic plan.
  • Motivates and Inspires – Your Vision is your Inspiration. Remember the Disney quote, “If you can dream it, you can do it.” This is your dream. Goals will help you make it a reality.
  • Measures Progress – Once you are into it, you can see how you are moving forward with each step you achieve. And when you see how far you’ve come – you’re more likely to keep going.
  • Enhances Focus – In our over-busy world, knowing where you are going keeps you on track. A goal gives you something to come back to when day to day things pull you away.
  • Builds Confidence – You began by getting past your fear. Now you are seeing what you can achieve when you are working on a big goal.

Simplifying the Goal-setting Process

  • Start Small – If you look at this huge project, you will convince yourself you can’t do it. You can drive across the entire country as long as you can see a few feet in front of you. Take the next step. Then take the next.
  • Use the SMART Framework – You know this well. Specific, Measurable, Achievable (yes, it is), Relevant, Time-bound. Search for other goal setting techniques if this one doesn’t speak to you.
  • Write It Down – Your Vision should be 50 words or less, written in the present tense, and hung in a prominent place in your library next to your Mission. You goals should be written out, too, creating your ongoing road map.
  • Visualize Success –  Spend time thinking about what it’s going to be like as this Vision comes into being. If it helps you, create a vision board to give you something to focus on.
  • Seek Support – Use your PLN and trusted vendors as needed. Connect with your library advocates and other librarians.
  • Be Flexible – Life happens. Expect delays and the need to tweak things as you go along. There will be bumps. You can keep going.
  • Celebrate Progress – When you set the goal, also set a reward or a way to acknowledge your accomplishment. Having that to look forward to as well as celebrating what you’ve achieved will help you keep going.  

Going for something powerful, like a Vision, will bring up all kinds of fears. They are telling you something – that what you are about to do is significant. Remember, when something is truly Inspirational and Aspirational, you know it will be worth the challenges – and the fears – to see it through.

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Is It Time To Quit?

It is more than likely that if you stay in a position for long enough, there will come a time when the job is no longer right for you. Either you’ve reached your goals within the limits of the job or with the current administration, or things around you change and you realize you would be better off searching for a different situation. Quitting has such a negative connotation, yet when you look at it objectively, it can be a highly positive and importantly proactive decision.

Many years ago, I was the librarian in a high school library I helped design. I had been a part of the school system for decades. I was well-respected in the school and an integral part of the teaching/learning process. Then we got a new principal. I used all the techniques I had learned to reach out to him and show the value of the library program. He liked none of it.

Although he caused tension and stress in my life, initially I had no thoughts of quitting. It wasn’t until the Superintendent of Schools, who was an ongoing supporter of my work, announced she was retiring in two years. I could foresee what would happen with my principal without the buffer offered by my Superintendent. Suddenly my future looked very different and quitting became a logical alternative.

Only a month after reaching out to my contacts (your network can be SO important!), I had an excellent job offer. Although the commute was longer and I lost my sick days, I kept my salary and found a far better situation. It was even worth losing tenure. I stayed in my new position for eleven years until I retired. The more I heard what was happening back in my old school, the happier I was with my decision.

With summer break upon us, take the opportunity to ask yourself – Is it time for me to quit? Depending on your years of service, should you retire or find another job?  If your answer is yes (or a strong maybe), use this time to plan your future course of action.

In his article, Quitting Doesn’t Always Make You a Quitter, Frank Sonnenberg discusses when quitting is recommended and ways of deciding if that’s your best option. Here are some of the 10 situations he recommends quitting. He asks, are you:

  • In a toxic relationship – Are you having to work with someone consistently who is detrimental to your work environment? This can have long reaching consequences professionally and personally.
  • Looking to cut your losses – Librarians and other educators stay because they keep hoping things will change, even when they know it won’t happen. Be honest about what’s happening and if it can be changed.
  • Getting stagnant – What if you are unable to make changes and feel you and your program are locked in the past? If nothing changes, nothing changes. Are you happy with how you’re able to grow your program?
  • Afraid of leaving your comfort zone – The devil you know vs. the unknown. Remember, it’s still a devil. Yes, there will be things lost if you move (sick days, tenue, coworkers you like), but there might be something new out there for you that is so much better. Don’t miss it!
  • Compromising your standards – These are difficult times, but it’s hard to face yourself in the mirror when you are afraid to uphold your core values and professional ethics. If you are in a school district that doesn’t align with your beliefs, this is a good reason to look elsewhere.

And here are some of the 15 ways to decide whether you should actually quit (or retire if that’s an option).

  • What, if anything, has changed to evoke these feelings from you? – How has the landscape changed to make you now consider leaving. Are there any you can anticipate?
  • Are you making a spur-of-the-moment decision? – Are you just tired and angry or have you been feeling this way for some time? A bad month or even a tough year my not be enough of a reason to leave – yet.
  • What’s the upside versus the downside? – Look honestly at what you will lose by leaving but look equally honestly at what you stand to gain by leaving. Don’t let fear of the unknown be what gets in your way.
  • Have you sought counsel from an objective person? – Talk it out with a fellow librarian who you trust to keep your conversation confidential. If you can, find someone in your state (or in our Facebook group) who has quit one position and found another.
  • Will you regret this decision five years from now? – Which do you think will honestly feel worse – staying or going? Yes, there are no guarantees either way, but the risk can be very worth the reward.

Sonnenberg closes with this W. C. Fields quote, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.” You are a leader. Sometimes the person you need to lead is yourself.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

Maximize Your Time

There are only 24 hours in a day, and no matter what you do – or how much needs to get done – there’s no way to use them all for work. So the goal becomes using the hours we have to our best advantage. But here’s the thing – what works for one person and seems productive, might not work for you and could, in fact, be detrimental to you in the long run. So before you decide how to organize your time – take the time to learn how you work best.

To create your own personal plan for maximizing your time, consider following this 4-step approach Chris Taylor presents in his article How to Make Your Days More Productive:

  1. What To Do –  Start by knowing your priorities – for a project, a semester, a school year. Even knowing this, you won’t get everything done (have you ever?) but if you can get clear on what’s most important and what will get you closest to where you want to be then you can organize your time and to-do lit accordingly.
  2. When To Do It – This is where it gets even more personal. What is your most productive time of the day? When are you most creative?  For me, it’s first thing in the morning.  I know other people who like to work at night when everyone else is sleeping. Schedule your high priority tasks at the times when you are most clear. Of course, if you’re not a morning person but are at work then, as best you can, do the activities that align with your energy and ability to focus.
  3. Where To Do It – Environment can play a large role in our productivity. Is your office space the best place for you to work?  Do you like or not like the buzz of others working nearby?  Do you find being outdoors stimulates your thinking? Be as honest as you can and then see where you can adapt your workflow to fit. Can you clear off your desk? What about adding pictures of favorite places that you can see while you work? When can you close your door?
  4. How To Do It Well – That is the ultimate challenge.  You need to turn off the interruptions that take you away from being as productive as possible.  This is not necessarily other people interrupting you.  It can be seeing stuff popping up in your email.  Or the phone ringing. Turn them off. Don’t see your email when you are working on these high priority tasks.  Turn off your phone until you are ready to attend to those messages. And when it’s time to focus on emails – stay focused on them and get as many answered as you can in the time you give it.

Like anything else, it will take practice and iteration of these four steps to make them part of your routine, but the results are worth it. Be prepared to tweak it as you work with it and learn what supports your success. Maybe you thought you could be creative for two hours at a time, but one is better followed by a break. Do what you can to limit the break, then get back to the priorities. There’s no way to add more time to the clock – so add time to your day by using what you have in the way the best supports you.

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Getting Positive Results From Difficult Conversations

Whether it’s with an administrator or a colleague, there are times when you are in opposite corners about how to do something. Ignoring the issue won’t make it go away—and will likely make things worse. When it’s an administrator, you might be seen as being insubordinate, which can cause severe consequences. In the situation with a teacher, your avoidance will hinder future collaboration and having a positive working relationship.

The conversation must happen. The results depend on how you approach and plan it. Go in knowing you won’t get everything you want, but that’s not the objective. Your goal is to make it work, not win an argument. Going in with the intention of winning is a guarantee that you won’t get a result that works.

In her article, Use the “Magic Wand of Destiny” to Get the Desired Outcomes, Kathy Stoddard Torrey puts forth a five-step approach that I believe can be very effective in helping you achieve the best possible results from these difficult conversations.

  • Define the Outcome – What is it you want to achieve and what are different parts of that goal (because remember, you’re not getting everything). Know what you need most. What will make the situation feel best for you? You’ve been told to close the library for several periods to allow for a meeting of the leagues Athletic Directors (ADs), but this restricts usage for others. A teacher wants students to use only books from the library for a project.
  • Create the Proper Space- Since you are initiating the conversion after learning about the challenge, you set the tone for it. An adversarial opening will not get the result you want. In dealing with the principal, you want to open with, “I will definitely give the ADs the space and time they need.” With the teacher, you can start with, “I want to fully understand your planned project.”
  • Ask Curious Questions – Show interest and willingness to help. These are people you want and need to work with. Ask the principal to let you know how many ADs will be coming. How often do they meet? Do they vary their meeting location? Ask the teacher, how many class periods will students be researching in the library? How does this project fit into the larger unit? What resources will they need and for how long?
  • Listen to Their Solutions First – Knowing what the other person expects can help you form your responses. In my examples, you and the library are the solution, so restate them to let them know you recognize what they want. For other situations, when the whole thing wasn’t spelled out in advance, let them explain how they expect to go about it. Continue to ask questions to be sure you have really understood what they want. Sometimes, in those answers, you can find a new solution. Once they have finished, propose your modifications. Ask the principal if you really need to close the whole library. Perhaps you can have a privacy screen around where the ADs meet, and classes can continue as scheduled. Show the teacher one particularly pertinent database and suggest it be offered as well, so students get used to taking notes from print and digital resources.
  • Ask Yourself: Does It Matter? – Choose your difficult conversations wisely. You don’t have to reach your desired outcome all the time. If accepting the recommendation or request doesn’t compromise your ethics, you might strengthen the relationship best by not asking for changes to their original request. When you go along with their plan, it can be a step in building the relationship.

The better you get at managing tough conversations, the stronger you become as a leader – and the more confidence you will gain. In the current education and political climate – in the US and abroad – there are more difficult conversations happening. We all need to work on not letting them become adversarial.

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Build Your Leadership On Your Strengths

So much of how we feel about going to work each day depends on our leaders. A great principal can make your day. A lousy one can kill your year. Many of us have had both and there are lessons to be learned from either. Let me give you two of mine.

My best principal ever knew all the teachers well. He was adept at noticing whether you were not yourself. If he saw that you were having an off day, he would often tell you to go to the nurse’s office and relax. He would teach your class. His leadership had so many benefits. The teachers felt that he not only cared, but he would take care of them. And the teachers were always willing to give back. If there was a shortage of a substitute one day, and he asked a teacher to cover an additional class, they would do so gladly. He also got to know the students on a different level from most principals I worked with, further showing his commitment and consistency.

On the other hand, I had a principal who was an egotistical misogynist. I, and almost everyone else, gave him the bare minimum. I was exhausted at the end of every day and brought my tension and anger home a lot. Too many of my dinner conversations began with, “You know what he did today?” It took me about a year before I appreciated how he was affecting all aspects of my life. Eventually, I began job hunting and found another position.

They both showed me important things about leadership – and how I did and didn’t want to lead. The first principal exuded empathy, an often-cited leadership quality. The second fell into the category of a leader who exemplified Power Over as his approach to leadership. What I hadn’t considered until I read Suzanne Degges-White’s article Are Ambiverts the Most Effective Leaders was a different way to determine your leadership mode.

Degges-White looks at introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts. We are familiar with the first two, but ambiverts, who embody both types, are less well known. And she says regardless of whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, you can become an ambivert. It is also important to recognize that no matter your type, you can be a good leader. “Effective leadership is based on healthy and productive relationships, not just personality types.” My two examples are evidence of that.

Taking a closer look at the strengths of each type of leader, Degges-White observes that introverts are good listeners, which means they think before jumping in to say something. They build relationships slowly and with care. They don’t seek the limelight, instead recognize the strengths others have. Extroverts are comfortable in a variety of settings. They tend to make decisions more quickly and pivot rapidly when needed. They are the ones who are seen as “natural” leaders.

So, what about ambiverts and their strengths? While they might like their alone time, they also enjoy being with others. They are comfortable with both individual projects and working on group ones. As leaders, they aren’t impulsive, but are open to trying new approaches. They are not afraid of taking risks, another often mentioned leadership quality.

The good news is that no matter if you see yourself as more of an introvert or an extrovert, you can become more of an ambivert. It only takes a few small steps to make you an ambivert. Fearful of risks? Take a few small ones. Do you dominate conversations? Make it a point to let others speak before you do. As you practice these steps, you will take on more and more qualities of ambivert.

As a leader, you always want to work from your strengths, but you can also get better. By stretching your natural personality type, you can become an ambivert – the most effective type of leader.

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Avoiding Conflict – Makes It Worse

As School Librarians one part of our job is to have positive relations with all our colleagues, but this doesn’t mean you’re going to like everyone. There will always be people who rub you the wrong way or who you wish you could avoid. People with whom it’s hard to speak, who have opposing viewpoints and with whom there is always a sense of conflict. But avoiding them and the situation prevents any likelihood of having positive relations.

So how can we powerfully step into situations where we know there is going to be conflict? In her post, Uncovering 5 Hidden Stages of Conflict, Marlen Chisolm explores how to look at what is going on under the service because, she asserts, the conflict is not the problem. The avoidance is. To understand this better, Chisholm discusses all the ways avoidance comes into play:

  1. Inner Disturbance – You just feel “off” every time you are in contact with that person. You get the feeling they don’t like you. It may not be overt, but you can’t avoid that antipathy coming from them. It’s uncomfortable, so you avoid unnecessary conversations with them or being in proximity to them. 
  2. Justifying – It doesn’t seem reasonable to confront them about that sensation. What could you say, anyway? Do you suspect it’s some innate bias, and then wonder if you are being ultrasensitive. Yet letting it go on doesn’t change anything. People treat you as you train them to treat you. What you accept will continue. By excusing or letting it go, you avoid facing and discussing the situation.
  3. Seeing Them as Adversary – When you let the situation continue, you tense every time you interact with them. Chisolm says we frequently find ourselves viewing  them as the enemy. While that is a natural self-defense, it doesn’t deal with the problem or cause any changes. Again, you are avoiding and the conflict continues.
  4. Seeking Social Proof – The longer it goes on, the more you look for evidence as to whether you are the only target, or to see if the person is that way with others. Now you seek corroboration. You ask others if they are seeing/feeling the same thing you are. In addition to not solving the problem, you are creating divisions which can affect how your community functions.Word will get back to the person, or worse to administrators, as to your queries. Nothing about will make you look professional. Through your avoidance, the problem has gotten worse.
  5. Aggression – As you continue avoiding the issue, you become increasingly frustrated and angry. Now you run the risk of a real blow up. Whatever follows will be heated. You have become the initiator and have probably damaged your reputation. Hopefully, your explosion didn’t happen where others could see, although word will spread. Being able to work with this teacher will be incredibly difficult, if not impossible. By avoidance, you have now also harmed students who won’t get the learning experiences you normally create.

Avoidance may seem safe, but as Chisolm has shown, it’s the worst option possible. As soon as you get that “Inner Disturbance,” accept that it’s a wake-up call to act. Take time –not too long—to gather your thoughts. What is the outcome you want? Ask yourself, “Do you want it to work, or do you want to win? Because if you want to win, it won’t work.”

Be prepared to do active listening. Don’t try to rush in with counter-arguments. Arguments are power struggles. The Power you need to draw on is Power With which is finding common ground among different interests. What do you and that teacher have in common? Focus on that.

Don’t let micro aggressions or other perceived negative feelings coming from someone affect your ability to be a good leader. Leaders work well with others and are willing to take risks when needed. 

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How To Tap Down Triggers

EDITOR’S NOTE – This blog about a specific and contained type of triggers. More serious, lasting triggers need a different kind of attention and help. Please get the support you need and deserve.

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What is a trigger? A month ago, I wrote Look for Glimmers and Find Joy which discussed how Glimmers were the opposite of triggers. Both cause an unanticipated emotional reaction. The first is wonderfully positive. The second can cause us any number of negative effects including damaging our relationships and how people perceive us and our program.

Glimmers and triggers are opposite in one other way. You have to notice glimmers to appreciate them. Triggers slam into you without any invitation.

While triggers take you unaware, if you are going to deal with them, you need to recognize when you are having a trigger response. This isn’t easy when your emotions are taking over.

Andrea Mein DeWitt’s article, A Leader’s 3-Step Strategy to Being Less Emotional, Reactive, recommend you Name, Claim, and Reframe. This approach will give you skills to modify what could be a damaging response from you. Notice that she references “leaders.” Leaders can’t allow triggers to affect how they react in a given situation.

Here are her steps:

  1. Name – Look for the source of the trigger. (This is not like noticing glimmers, but in reverse.) She asks you to identify what is causing you to react rather than respond – an important distinction – and what specific emotion is in play. Also note what, if any, of your core values have been attacked. For example, book banning and malicious name-calling is on the rise leaving us emotionally exhausted. We are tired of explaining. When one more attack comes, particularly if it comes from what we thought was a friendly source, we can explode.
  2. Claim – Now that you know where your reaction came from, what can you do about it? De Witt wants you to identify the action(s) you can take to bring you back to your core values. Take your ego out and think what might have caused the person to say/do what then triggered your reaction. Then, look to what can you do to get the conversation back to the issue at stake. Rather than responding by saying “we are not…(insert charge)..” turn to the positive, reminding parents, teachers and administrators that,“libraries need to be a safe, welcoming space for all.” From there, you can better discuss what to do.
  3. Reframe – This helps you to move on positively from a stressful conversation. DeWitt says to ask yourself what you learned and what is now an opportunity to use your creativity. Which of the ideas you came up with will produce the best results and promote your Mission and Vision? Notice any new resources you can now use. As you reflect on what happened, you might decide to do a bulletin board or infographic identifying how libraries create a safe space. Perhaps mention the Mirrors, Windows, and Sliding Doors concept. Do something interactive such as having teachers/students anonymously post notes on the bulletin board saying how the library/librarian made them safe and welcome.

We are in the relationship business. With emotions running high and politics affecting libraries and librarians, we must do all we can to avoid being further sucked into the intensity of the triggers and stresses around us. Emotional Intelligence includes Managing Your Emotions for a reason. Leaders – and you are a leader – need to have all the tools possible to do it.

Posted on by hildaweisburg

The Lasting Legacy of Librarians

In the May 2024 issue of Educational Leadership (EL), the journal of the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development (ASCD), the opening of the article “Increasing the Psychic Rewards of Teaching” caught my attention. The author, Koss Minor, quotes the following from Dan Lortie’s book Schoolteacher: A Sociological Study:

While lawyers know whether they have won or lost a case, and architects get to see their designs rendered into a house, teachers must rely on more psychic rewards—subjective experiences that lend themselves towards feelings of success.

It is perhaps even truer for school librarians. Teachers can point to standardized tests (not that these are the best indicators) and end-of-unit assessments. As librarians, we create  our own ways of measuring what our students learned and took away from any given learning experience – often only lasting for one class. And, yes, there are studies such as those written by Keith Curry Lance and Debra E, Katchel showing what we bring. The studies are sadly too often been ignored by administrators who sometimes see them as self-serving. Some days it’s hard to keep doing what we do as we see budgets and positions being eliminated.

But today I can tell you quite definitively that what we do is not only important, but remembered.

Fifty years ago, I returned to school librarianship after my youngest began an all-day nursery program and became the librarian of a brand-new, K-6 public school based on the British infant school plan. It was there that I learned much about cooperating with teachers – and did what I thought was the main job of a school librarian – I read stories to all grades.

That wouldn’t be the focus of any librarian today. It can’t be. However, as I recently learned, we must not lose this aspect of what we bring to students. To recognize the 50th anniversary milestone, the borough decided to celebrate it. There was a carnival – and a Facebook group for it. When I posted I had great memories of my time there and was looking forward to being there, former students began commenting. A few hoped I would read a story again.

The request for a story was my first indicator of what I saw once I was at the event. My former students kept coming to me talking about what they remembered. They spoke of specific books that lingered and mattered. One mentioned the Phantom Tollbooth by Norman Juster. She noted when she saw it in a bookstore, she bought six copies to distribute to friends to read to their kids. Others shared that they got their love of reading from me. The day made reminded me that the most lasting gift we can give our students is the joy of reading.

In the 50 years since I started this journey with you, librarians have pivoted constantly. We have become the tech experts in our buildings. We keep up with whatever new technology comes along. We share our expertise with teachers. We adapt our collection for the times and the students in our building.

And still our numbers shrink.

Librarians are leaving the profession at an alarming rate, partially from exhaustion and stress. Unfortunately, a bigger reason is the attacks we have been facing not only from parents and boards of education but also from state legislators. How do we continue to get up each day and enthusiastically work on carrying out our Mission Statements and bringing our Vision Statements into reality?

In writing this blog, I searched the internet to find articles on the part of our Mission Statement we often overlook – creating lifelong readers. The best I could do was this MiddleWeb blog, School Libraries Build Lifelong Reading Skills. Although it was from a classroom teacher’s perspective who started with her classroom library, she did reach out to the school librarian. The cooperation was great, but students had very few opportunities to be in the library.

What is missing is the joy. That is something key we bring and must continue to bring.

I hope you can find ways in today’s tech-driven world to bring the joy of reading to students. Keep reading stories at the elementary level, have book clubs at middle and high school. Because one of the ways we create a legacy is through fostering the love of reading. Keep being there for your students – and trust that you are making a lasting difference.